*Happy Memorial Day, folks! Like many of you, I’m taking the day off. With that being said, check out last week’s MMM which I was unable to post (don’t ask)….
So, this week’s MMM turned into a all-morning affair. And the preparation took 15 months. Yes. FIF-TEEN. It was my own personal version of “putting a pot of rice on.” If you don’t know what I mean by that, check out my inaugural post for an in-depth description. In short, “putting a pot of rice on” involves putting in the work necessary to create the right opportunities for yourself. When I started my law firm, I had a very clear vision of what I wanted it to become. I knew my brand was meant to be a lot more than just “lawyer chick,” but unfortunately, I wasn’t exactly sure how I’d accomplish each step to get there. But, I did what I do best. I planned and planned. And planned. Somewhere along the way, I came to the harsh realization that I would need some help to make all this happen. I use the term “harsh realization” because, like most twenty-sixers, it is ridiculously hard for me to ask for help. This is where the multi-talented twenty-sixer can get a little hung up. We know how to do a lot of things. And if we don’t know how to do something, we often become hellbent on figuring it out. As much as we hate to admit it, collaboration can often feel like a burden more than a blessing. It’s nothing personal. We just prefer to go it alone. Now I am a firm believer that I can accomplish whatever I put my mind to. But sometimes I’m so focused on the “I can” part, that I ignore those around me who are ready, willing and able to help me get to my desired outcome a lot more quickly, and with better results.
Well, this law practice was a game changer…and by game changer, I mean a “swift kick to the face” kind of reminder that even I, yes I – the type-A, slightly neurotic, big-dreaming overachiever who prides herself on doing everything on or ahead of schedule – could potentially crash and burn without the help of friends, family and colleagues. That reminder is how I came to begin working on this week’s MMM well over a year ago. I knew I needed a certain “big break.” I can’t reveal what that big break is quite yet, but it seemed almost impossible at the time. Yet, I forged ahead. I “put a pot of rice on.” I described in that inaugural post, I took stock of every gift, idea, and opportunity within reach and tried to make it work for me. I strategized. I made calls and scheduled lunches to pick people’s brains…the whole nine. Almost every day, I would handle all of my regular responsibilities and turn my attention back to “Operation Big Break.” I would literally fall asleep just before dawn with my laptop somewhere close by. I was FOCUSED.
The months rolled on, and I could not seem to progress past the point of my own strategizing. Yet, I was undeterred. “These things take time,” I told myself. I kept hashing out my ideas. I was patient. Patient and stubborn. You see, while I had tried to make every idea and opportunity work for me, I had left out a key component of the equation. I failed to consider every person that might be able to help. Ugh. It was one thing to dream up outlandish goals for myself and work on them privately. It was a completely different ballgame to share them with people who may not get it…or offer not-so-constructive criticism. Yes, I was meeting with people to get information…but I wasn’t asking any of them for help. I’m not even sure exactly when it happened, but eventually I decided to put my pride and fear of rejection aside. I made a pact with myself: “reach out to everyone who might be able to help you get this off the ground. Don’t make assumptions about what you think they will or will not do. If they are not interested, do NOT take it personally. Move on.” And this is exactly what I did.
The first few conversations didn’t really lead anywhere. But then…it happened. I set up a meeting with a business acquaintance of mine. I explained exactly what I had in mind. His response: “I think I know some people who can help you. Send me a detailed proposal.” Now, remember, this is something I had been working on for a YEAR…but because I never intended to ask for outside help, I didn’t exactly have it in proposal form. So, I cleared my schedule for the next few days and went to work turning all those ideas into what I thought was a meticulously crafted, well-written “pitch.” I sent it off to him. He liked it, but had a few critiques. I made some changes, then a few more changes, and he passed it along. Another month or so passed, and I heard nothing. No big deal. I went on about my normal routine.
Just when I pretty much forgot about it, I got an urgent text from my acquaintance: “Please call me ASAP.” Assuming he had a legal problem, I reluctantly obliged. I couldn’t have been more wrong. “A friend of mine saw your proposal. He’d like to meet you this evening. Can you make it?” Long story short, five minutes into that unexpected dinner meeting, this person whom I had just met said, “I have to admit, I was in a rush…so, I only skimmed what you sent over. But I think it’s brilliant. I’m in, and so is a friend of mine. Can you stay and eat?” I was stunned. Over a year of preparation led to a complete stranger being sold on my ideas in a matter of minutes.
This morning, I met up with that other friend of his. She and I discussed my plans in further detail and hammered out a few logistics. Then, we lost track of time talking over cappuccino about things that had nothing to do with my career. The irony was not lost on me. After what felt like a very long year of slaving away solo, it all suddenly felt so easy once I did the thing that I dreaded most – got others involved. At some point, I’ll be able to tell you more about this opportunity. But, in the meantime, make the most of your own resources, take stock of your own contact list, and put that put that pot of rice on.
