Four years ago today, my beloved grandmother passed away at the age of 67, roughly five weeks before my law school graduation. I was devastated. The story of her transition is one that I still cannot fully recount without falling apart, so I’ll spare you the details here. But, there is a reason why I’ve chosen to launch this site on the anniversary of her death and the hardest day of the year for me. I usually spend April 9th battling intense feelings of loss and grief, but I’ve decided that misery is no way to pay homage to the greatest earthly source of love and light that I have yet to encounter. Instead, I believe the best way to honor her legacy is to be a living example of what it means to lead an extraordinary life even on the darkest of days. With that being said, welcome to December 26er (if you’re not sure what the site is all about, learn more here). I’m not good with long introductions, so let’s jump right into it.
We often think of death as a finite event. I mean, while various religions and spiritual belief systems promote life after death, it’s hard to deny how gut-wrenching the end of an earthly connection with someone can be. It is a very real void that I’m still working through. But having to move through life with only the recollections of my grandmother has brought all kinds of lessons that I may have not otherwise gotten. For example, the other day, one particular memory popped into mind.
I was cooking dinner, something I do a lot more often now that I have to keep a business and home financially afloat. Just as I was turning down a pot of rice, I thought about her. My grandmother, or “nana” as I liked to call her, was an AMAZING cook, and everyone knew it. She always had an open door policy, so it was not uncommon for neighbors and friends to stop by for a meal at random. Nana’s culinary repertoire was vast, but no matter what was being served, there almost always seemed to be a large batch of white rice being kept warm in the oldest, most banged up pot imaginable on the back burner of stove. Everyone in the house would feed off that rice, and whatever was left over at the end of the night would be thrown out back for the birds’ morning meal.
I loved the stuff as a kid, so I never thought anything of it (I now know that no one should be eating that much rice, but I digress). As I got older, however, I realized how tight things were for my grandparents financially. My grandfather had fallen ill and gone blind years prior, and my grandmother was the main breadwinner. That pot of rice was not a delicacy. It was a NECESSITY… a way to stretch meals and ensure everyone had enough to eat. Now, years later, as I stood in my own kitchen, stressed as always about business and personal concerns, budgets and the like, it all clicked: “You’ve got to put a pot of rice on, Delisha.” In other words, “you have to be resourceful!”
When I talk to friends and colleagues about life goals and dreams, a common thread is often what we don’t have, but need in order to achieve. This kind of negative talk causes a domino effect. We become so focused on what we think is outside of our grasp, yet oh so necessary, that we fail to notice and utilize all the resources we do have. Here is the hard truth. There will always be more “out there” that would make your journey a little easier – more money, more advice, more connections, more talent. You name it. But if you don’t have “more,” crying foul and playing victim isn’t going to get you anywhere. You’ve got to put your own pot of rice on. You have to take stock of every gift, idea, person, and opportunity within reach and make it work for you. Get creative. Do the work. What you have may not be much, but it’s enough to get started and will likely take you much farther than you think. Do this, and I promise, at some point, you’ll look back and realize that you never even needed more.
What dream or goal have you dismissed or delayed due to a perceived lack of resources? Leave a comment explaining how you plan put your own pot of rice on to get back on track!
23 Comments
Stay Encouraged !! This is an Awesome beginning!!
Thanks for the encouragement! Hope you’ll keep reading as the site grows!
This posting was an icredible and inspiring read! I have like four pots of rice I need cook up! My name is Adjoa Christina Idun and I’m a December 26er!
That you are! And one of those pots of rice would be :-)?
Yes, that was my mother! As Shirley Caesar said: “She put LOVE down in the bag”. My mom put love in every meal she served! My pot of Rice today is to “LET MY VOICE be heard! Thanks Delisha for sharing. Love u baby girl!
Let it be heard! There are many channels to do so with ease.
In remembrance of says so much for one that is not afraid to take the time to do such – Remember! You are just an amazing and aspiring young lady that insist on prospering! Nothing like a Grandma that wasn’t afraid to stand over a stove!
NOTHING like them :-).
Resources…our greatest asset. Well done Delisha! Thanks for sharing.
Appreciate the support!
I also had this same experience my own mother,she always took what little she had and turned it into so much more. Thank you so much for this Sis, My Pot Of Rice is to take this little love for baking I have and stretch if further than I could ever imagine . Love you Sis always
You go for it T’Rae!
This is Awesome Delisha.
Crystal and your Pot of Rice is: Visions Crystal Clear?
Thank you! I think I know what your pot of rice is 🙂
Yes, I thought about your mother too while writing this post. Another woman who fed me with love. You most certainly can take this baking business to the next level! Love you.
It is amazing to see how the older generations took a “little” a created so much. They rarely had time to complain about whatever their lack was. In contrast, we have SO many resources at our fingertips, yet we seam to commiserate over the slightest inconvenience. OMG!!! I left my self phone at home, the world is going to end.
Thanks for sharing the legacy of your grandmother with us.
Truth. Glad you enjoyed it. Our journey several years ago sowed the seed of inspiration for this site.
Thank You, For Sharing
Hey Mz. D…This is awesome…Your Nana would most definitely be proud of you…I am…I will be returning to school in Sept. 2013 to continue my degree in music performance…I will be 57 in June…I must complete this, as I have put it off for too many years…My goal, to have my Bachelors of Art in Music Performance at age 61….Then I will complete my masters…That’s my plan…I ask that you keep me in prayer…Love ya Mz…D…From the heart…
Now, THIS is what I call putting a pot of rice on. Best wishes to you, Ms. Renee. You can do it!
Just read this now Delisha! You have a way with words! This was very inspiring. Loved it and keep it going!!
Thank you! I’m glad you enjoyed it!